18 till I die

18 till I die

I spent the last evening watching a delightful show ‘Tarang’ put up by the Indian students of NEU. Amidst the gambol; the foot-stamping Punjabi-bollywood music; the argument over dinner with a friend about why the south Indians are always (un)der-represented at any “Indian get-together” in the USA; the conversation about college and school binge….. I re-called many a things which was sub-consciously buried deep down within me over the past two years…

As I watched the simulating dances, many a bright perky girls and boys entertaining the two hundred odd crowds, I was surprisingly feeling weird and restless. It took me many moments to sink in that for the very first time in my life at a party of performances and total vitality; I was a mere sitting-spectator and not the howling hooting cheering and dancing hooligan in the crowd. I tried to remember when the last time was, that I had some mindless fun and jumped to my favorite tunes in a company of friends.

It was the ever crowded raucous Rock-show at IIT-Saarang; The smooth yet loud show of KK; The vivacious merry-making at a birthday party; Dancing in gaps of the bus during school excursions; Making the human chain at the school fest of ‘Magnum opus’; The college day celebrations and after; And many more rollicks that made ‘student life’ a trip to harbor!!

I had a sudden rush of deja-vu and wished I could re-live times spent and moments bygone and join the yowling bunch. At the very same time, I felt drawn back. May be I was growing up too fast. I wanted to be 18 again. I fought the mixed emotions and concluded it was all part of moving on. It was part of evolving from an insouciant student to an independent responsible individual?. May be I have had my share of breezy unguarded lark. But certain facts were glaring right at me — I had lost the appetite and gaiety to blend into ‘any’ crowd for a round of fun; I had forgotten to be the bubbly popular-self in a throng of classmates; I could no longer enjoy a party and not worry about waking up late the next day.

When was it that life had become a four-walled cube in a remote office; a countless dry dishes in the sink; post-it notes of pending errands; basket full of laundry and working-from-home weekends??

I didn’t have time to ponder over these thoughts as I had to hit the bed to be able to get to work early. I left the day to a fond smile and gave it up to the life at 18!


5 thoughts on “18 till I die

  1. Sapna says:

    Are you mad… never give up on being crazy and mixing with the crowd… thats what friends are for, when we meet up next time… lets go for one of these concerts and we ll dance like crazy….[:)]

  2. Divya Das says:

    haha… i guess its not about the concert or even dancing.. its all about the fact that u didnt ve to make time to have fun or find time to go out for lunch with pals back then.. it was routine..

  3. Lehmunade says:

    You dont have to be 18 to live like it – yes you might not be able to party all night every night, but come to think of it, we didnt really party all night every night even in univ rt?Wait for those Friday nights, and remember the 4-walled cubicle gives you all the moolah that you can spend at that dance party!

  4. Divya Das says:

    hmmm…. ya we never partied all night everyday.. but its not about partying every weekday… its about being to do it anytime in the week without considering n things!

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